I Love U In Me & Horny Toad

Evolution & Human Mating Strategies

“I Love U In Me” b-side of the single The Arms of Orion (1989), “Horny Toad” b-side of the single Delirious (1982)

When it comes to finding a partner that will mate with us there are a plethora of variables that must be considered. One of the more strident questions is “Is this person what I'm looking for in a sexual mate?” Since the dawning of mankind this has been a question man has had to answer. Once we resolve this question and decide to start a relationship with that person the question of sexual fidelity becomes the ever present question that runs in the background of the relationship like a computer's operating system.

The field of Evolutionary Psychology argues that humanity has constructed different mating strategies to guarantee their reproductive success (Schmitt, 2007). There are two main strategies that people adopt. The first is the monogamy method this is the restricted strategy and it requires commitment to and emotional investment in a relationship from a partner before sexual intercourse can occur (Markey, P., & Markey, C., 2007). The lyrics from “I Love U In Me” speaks to the intimacy of sex that is central to this commitment based method of mating, Our bodies sink in a pool of sweat, It's the kind of love that you never forget,With you honey, I'm the richest in the world, I don't need money 'cause you're my girl.

The other major mating method is less restrictive in nature. This unrestricted method requires little or no emotional commitment or investment in the relationship and the person may be willing to engage in sexual relations quickly with a prospective partner (Schmitt, 2007). Love and romance are not necessarily prerequisites to sex for those who embrace this strategy. Lines like, I don't love you I'm just a horny toad and All I want is to rub your body, I can't help it I'm just a horny toad from “Horny Toad” show the emotional detachment that those who vibe with an unrestricted sexual worldview often approach sexual encounters. Studies show that generally men are higher than women are in the unrestricted strategy (Markey, P., & Markey, C., 2007). The historical evolutionary perspective has been that men tend to be less sexually restricted than women because they invest less in reproduction and have the potential ability to impregnate many partners (Schmitt, 2007). Whereas, women invest heavily in reproduction and they can only have one pregnancy at a time (Schmitt, 2007). Knowing this women should be expected to be more selective than men in regard to who they have sexual intercourse with. Yet this is not always the case because there are some women that have an unrestricted orientation, while some men adopt a sexually restrictive stance and are sexually faithful to their partners.

To explain this behavior, evolutionary psychologists in recent history have developed more sophisticated theories that acknowledge that each individual may choose from more than one kind of mating strategy regardless of their sex (Schmitt, 2007). Females who adopt a restricted sexual stance will seek out sexual partners who display a willingness to invest emotion, time and resources into the relationship and provide for her future children (Markey, P., & Markey, C., 2007 ). Females with an unrestricted sexual standpoint might seek out partners who show signs of desirable genes that are congruent with reproductive success, in order to pass those genes onto her children (Markey, P., & Markey, C., 2007). In other words they seek to mate with men who are physically attractive and/or have high social status. These kinds of men typically will find these unrestricted women preferable to the more restricted type who demand more monogamy, as they seek out to mate with as many women as possible (Markey, P., & Markey, C., 2007 ). Men who consider themselves less desirable (lower on the social ladder, not physically attractive, etc.) might have less of a chance of being successful in mating with many partners; therefore they will adopt a restricted orientation in order to appeal to restricted women because they realize with these types of partners they might not need money 'cause they have a restricted minded girl (Markey, P., & Markey, C., 2007).

These two broad strategies tends to maintain a balance over time because the people who live by one strategy tend to compete most vigorously with those in the same orientation (Schmitt, 2007). For example a man who has a mate that adopts an unrestricted stance has to primarily be concerned with people that adhere to an unrestricted stance. Generally speaking people who have a restricted view of sexuality do not seek to mate and settle down with those who don't. Let me once again state these are but two of many different mating patterns. We did not touch on open relationships, sex only relationships or sexual relationships based on monetary gain, there are too many different strategies that cannot be covered in a blog post. For those interested in hearing about this other mating strategies check out the article: Sexual Strategies Theory: An evolutionary perspective on human mating by David M. Buss and David Schmitt. Human genes are not monolithic. Just as sure as there are different eye colors, resistance to disease and mental abilities there are different mating patterns within mankind. Happy mating everyone.

References

Markey, P. M., & Markey, C. N. (2007). The interpersonal meaning of sexual promiscuity. Journal of Research in Personality, 41(6), 1199-1212.

Schmitt, D. P. (2007). Sexual Strategies Across Sexual Orientations. Journal of Psychology & Human Sexuality, 18(2-3), 183-214.